Forget the Vision Board-Do This Instead!

Who remembers the day the Vision Board came on the scene? I don’t. Honestly, I had to google some info on it. I mean besides our beautiful Rhonda who uses it and swears by it, did you know the vision board actually started way back in the cave man days? Peculiar but it’s true. They used it to visualize their hunt. See the correlation here? I kinda do. Sort of. But as of a few years ago I decided to just forget the vision board and do this instead.

I get that some people use the vision board faithfully to bring their dreams to life. People are all over that. Me? Not so much. Oh don’t get me wrong, I tried it. Me and my girlfriend actually had a vision board party (several years ago) where we sat around and smoked weed and cut out pictures from magazines of how we wanted our lives to look.

At the end of the day, it did nothing for me. All I saw were pictures of stacks of money, nice cars, a picture of Johnny Depp, happy smiling people, etc. I felt nothing. I looked at my board, shrugged and walked away. I felt like I just created a collage for some project in kindergarten.

It’s not all bad!

Now I’m not gonna shit on people who actually love, and swear by, their vision boards. Kudos to you! Whatever it takes for you to bring your dreams to life, you go girl/man!! All the power to you. I think it’s fantastic that you guys have a powerful vision and you are working towards creating it. Not many people do that. Too many people dream things but never take action to actually materialize them.

So give yourself a big pat on the back for being one of the minority who want to work towards a better life. The vision board has worked miracles for hundreds of thousands, maybe even millions, of people around the world. I’m certain it works. It simply wasn’t doing shit for me and it was time for me to just forget the vision board.


Then I discovered this!!!

I like to think I’m a visual creature. That’s how I learn and stay focused. Not this time though. The cut out, glued up pictures did diddly squat for this girl.

I need to write my shit out and read it daily, a million times a day if I have to. My space had become post it note central. They were everywhere. Coffee maker, kitchen cupboards, utensil drawer, bathroom mirror (ya those ones looked a little rough after awhile), dashboard of the car, closet, you name it, I had a post it note, or 10 or 20, around it.

Then one day a friend of mine says “Hey Iva, I got something I want you to try”.

In walks the Mind Map. Hell-o!! Where have you been all my life? Oh how I loved everything about this. One bristle board, colour of your choice, and magic markers! Woot!

Let’s write and write and write!!! I was in my glory. Finally someone got me. What took them so long (or should I say, what took me so long)?

My bristle board choice of colour? Stark white!! I wanted to see every single little thing i wrote out in black and white. Big bold letters. Big check marks. Big stars beside them.


Slow but sure and steady, things starting happening. I wrote out that I wanted this___ at this time____ and this is what I had to do to get it___ , and I did. Things were finally working out for me.

I wrote it out, I read it every day, I figured out ways on how I was going to achieve it and it happened. Just like magic. My life started taking a turn for the better. Finally.

I would cross off goals as I achieved them. Sometimes I would have to extend deadline dates but that’s ok too. I never lost sight of what I wanted. It was there in front of me in black and white. Kinda hard to ignore that.

Choose your weapon.

Now I’m no expert on manifestation or visualizations or anything like that but I can say that, hands down, the mind map did for me what the vision board couldn’t. But that’s just me.

If you have been frustrated with your vision board lately or looking for something else that slightly resembles it but produces different results, then maybe it’s time to give the mind map a whirl. Trust me on this one. Got questions? I got the answers! I say, forget the vision board and try this instead.

Sorry, post it notes, but you do make a great grocery list!

Peace and Love


5 Crazy Ways to Handle Failure.

Ah failure. No one wants to talk about it. We never want to admit to it. It’s like saying the *F* word. Fuck. That one. Ironic that failure happens to be an *F* word too. But there are easy ways to handle it.

This post is for those of us who still have the failure mentality. Here are some fun and crazy ways to handle this crap next time it happens to you.

Carrying on………..

So we failed at something and the first thing we do? Bury our head in the sand. We stay away from people so we don’t have to answer the questions. The last thing we want to do is talk about this failure that just occurred.

Why does everyone want to talk about it? Why can’t they just shut up about? People love to hear about tragic shit. Drama, devastation, tragedy. Yup! For some bizarre reason, they are drawn to negative stuff. And your recent failure is right up there on the list of ground-breaking news.

News flash for you guys! We don’t wanna talk about it right now so piss off. Please. How about we talk about other stuff like oh, the weather, the latest UFC fight card, the newest skin care line that will take years off your face? Yes, let’s talk about mindless shit please, for the love of God.

I am no stranger to failure. I’ve had my fair share. It’s little wonder I am not a raging alcoholic or crack user as a result of all the crap I’ve been through (and no, I’m def not looking for any sympathy here). The first few times I failed at something it was devastating for me. Now? Meh. Not so much. I’ve learned to handle it in a much different way. I now know exactly what failure is.

So how do I handle it now?

When I suffer failure, I still have to bury my head in the sand and cry but that usually only lasts about an hour now. (it used to last for weeks!!) Yup I still do this. Keep in mind that failure is a bit of a loss of something, right? A bad blow. A brick that hit hard. The immediate loss? Your pride. Other loss? Self-confidence. And what do we want to do when this happens? For most people, cry.

Anyway, I figured it was time to learn new ways of handling this failure thing cause crying was just leaving my eyes all puffy and I would eventually have to handle the crowd of finger pointers and whisperers. It was time to pull up my big girl panties and handle failure like a pro. I mean, by now, I should be a pro at it, yes?

So here is my list of the crazy things I like to do the day after failure. They don’t necessarily make me feel good days or weeks to come but they make me feel good that day and that’s all I need. That’s all that matters.


I love doing this and anyone who knows me knows that Despicable Me 2 is my favorite movie of all time. I’ll watch that movie all fucking day! Those minions make me so friggin happy it’s not even funny.

Junk food coma anyone?

I’ll eat chocolate, popcorn, chips, Fruit Loops for dinner (yes I have a box of Fruit Loops, and??), ju jubes, you name it, I’ll get it and eat it. The stove or microwave don’t get used. I cook nothing and will only eat anything that comes out of a box and can be eaten immediately.

Pj day! Yes!

My go to pj’s are my Tweety Bird ones. They are cozy and cute. I almost feel safe in them. Childlike if you will.

Step away from the electronics please.

…and any other form of communication from the outside world. I know, crazy right??? Most of us can’t even do that for an hour. Try a day! Pretend you still live in the rotary phone era.

Truth letter time!

Write one of these to someone who recently pissed you off and tell them how fan-friggin-tastic your life is now that they are not part of your life anymore and how successful and rich and awesome you are. I love doing this. My letter is rather colorful with lots of, um, descriptive words. I can get a lot of shit out in a short period of time writing this letter. It’s liberating and a whole lot of fun!

Oh, and no, don’t send it to them. Burn it, rip it up, do whatever but DO NOT MAIL IT!!

This is my list of crazy things I like to do that help me forget my troubles for the day. I understand, of course, that the next day, life resumes and you still have to deal with stuff (and maybe a sore belly too) but it is easier for me to get a grip on the failure I just suffered.

I have a new found determination to try something else. My mind is cleared, (though you would think it would be in a junk food coma) and I can view things differently, in a more positive way.

How do you deal with failure? What are your tricks that help you get past it? I’d love to hear them.

By the way, Faith is an F word too!

Peace and Love


Stressing out With Technology!

Being a hairstylist is really a fun simple, but slightly glam, kinda life. I get to play in people’s hair all day. Laugh, tell stories, transform bad hair into fab hair, build relationships. I also get to wear the coolest clothes in the world, do my hair anyway I want and have the freedom of being me in an uptight blue collar redneck northern Ontario city (I’m gonna duck now because I’m sure many of my peeps will throw things at me for calling Sudbury redneck, but fact is, it still is).

It’s really a great sweet glam life. I do love it. A lot. I love it so much, in fact, that I even wrote a book about it. Yup I sure did. This sweet life should obviously then be enough for me, right? Sounds like I got the world by the balls, yes? Not quite.

There’s more to this life, no?

I realized that as I get older, this hair-styling life may not be so easy on these joints. I’m also convinced that inhaling copious amounts of hairspray and cut hair on a daily basis may not be the best thing for my lungs either (yes we actually accidentally inhale your cut hair sometimes too…yum). Hairball anyone?

I need a plan B. For me, plan B was easy. I’m a writer. I’m also the happy girl that blows sunshine and rainbows in your face and rides around on a unicorn. I realize my purpose in life is to write and make people happy. Now THAT sounds like a mega fun thing to do. I still get to wear cool clothes and do my hair anyway I want. Perfect.

What I didn’t realize was in order to do all this and live this dream life, I had to get on the computer more and do internet stuff. Suddenly this new fun life and all that things that went with it seemed rather daunting to me. Blogging, tweeting, online networking, social media, multitasking and O. M. G.!! This crazy little hairstylist was in for something rather large and had to start new learning things again, quickly. So I made a schedule. Just stick to it, Iva. You can do this. Right? Wrong.

Overload, Delete, Error..

My 9 hour days suddenly turned into 12-14 hour days. 8 hours at the salon, 5 hours on the computer before and after work. Write, network, comment, repeat. Surf and turf is now surf and search, wtf? This new crazy life was out of control and had me pulling my hair out. I knew this can’t be good because I happen to really love my hair. I was starting to lose focus and get absolutely completely frustrated and irritated by this whole internet, computer thing. I started questioning what on earth it was that I was getting myself into.

I don’t understand 95% of this computer stuff and don’t have the patience for 96% of it. Don’t delete that!!………oh shit. Too late. Pull more hair out. Swear some more. So much of the internet lingo was beyond me. Hashtags? Tweeting? What? Suddenly my 12 year old canary Buddy has competition. I was pretty sure I was doomed and went back to thinking that being a hairstylist isn’t so bad after all. I mean, when I reach my 60’s I’ll just buy ibuprofen in bulk and be good to go.

And a hero arrives

Out of nowhere appears this pretty cool and amazing young man, Josh Coffy, that speaks my language and steers me in the right direction. He is my knight in shining armor. I was headed down a path of too many margeuritas and baldness and he saved me. I totally, and finally, understand what’s going on in this internet world.( Ok well maybe not totally but I’m a lot calmer now. )The rules, the how’s the why’s the do’s and don’ts.

Still lots for me to learn but I finally got a handle on all of it. And suddenly, it’s not so overwhelming for me anymore. I have a spreadsheet, I have a schedule, I have a clear purpose and I’m on a mission. I got this shit!

Focus… focus

You know what you want to do, you have a vision, you feel it so deep in your soul, your bones, your being, but it’s scary and you hide from it. Face your fear! Go forth with determination! Find people who can help you. Stop running and hiding. The world needs you and your gift. No one else can do what you do the way you do it. Don’t ever give up on your dreams. There is a knight in shining armor for everyone. Don’t give up on yours!

Don’t worry Buddy, you’ll always be my favorite Tweet.

Peace and Love




4 Simple Steps to the New Life You Want and Deserve!

So many of us want to change, want a better and new life, a new job, maybe even a happier more loving relationship or friendships BUT we do nothing to achieve them. All we do is think about it, dream about it, maybe even talk about it a little bit but that’s about it. It all starts and stops there (because many of us simply don’t know how to bring this new life into reality).

So when does this new life happen? You know, the one you keep talking about? When are you actually going to start doing something about it? We are going to talk about the 4 super easy ways to bring this new life alive. Finally!

That’s ok. That’s your wake up call. I feel sorry for those who don’t answer the call and let it go to voice mail. You should never do this.  If you get the call, answer it. It’s your life, right?

So how many of you have taken the time to read motivational and inspirational material? You know the kind: Tony Robbins, Rhonda Byrnes, Abraham Hicks, Les Brown (need I go on?). Anything you’ve ever read from any of these gurus always has one common theme: Simply put, this means that you can’t just write shit down on boards and post it notes and stick them all over the place and expect it all to manifest. You actually have to get off your ass and work them!! How??

First and foremost, write it out in big bold letters.

Write it out somewhere you are going to see it daily. You will look at this every day, several times a day. The more you see it, the more you feel it, desire it and believe you are going to have it. The more you see it, also, the more it will be on the forefront of your mind and not just a little cloud bubble over your head anymore.

Do research. 

Is it going to take you a month of Sundays to achieve this? How hard is it going to be? Will it cost you all your savings and your first born child? Will it cost you nothing? Find out, dig around and dig deep. If you truly and sincerely are serious about bringing your dreams to life, you need to find out what’s involved and how badly you want it. If you want it very bad, you will do the work.

 Talk about your new life. 

Tell your friends, your family, your coworkers, whoever will listen to you and whoever you feel comfortable enough to share it with. The more you talk about it, the more you are indirectly holding yourself responsible for getting into action. These people are going to follow up and say “Hey Sally how’s that dream of yours coming along?”. It better be coming along well or you’re gonna look like nothing but a big dreamer with a loud voice.

Get to work. 

You’ve researched, you’ve written it out, you’ve talked about now all that is left is the work. Get to it!!! How bad do you want change in your life? How bad do you want a new life? It’s up to you to do the work. Nobody else is going to do that for you! Get at her. You know what’s involved now. You have two choices from here on in, ditch it or do it. I go with do it!!!!

Don’t leave your dreams simmering on the back burner. The longer it stays on the back burner, the greater the likelihood of it being ignored and only staying a dream, never getting dusted off and never transpiring into something great! Like it should!

For the love of God, stop putting it off! Did you know that whatever your dream is, it quite possibly, could affect and touch the lives of hundreds or thousands or maybe even millions of people around the world? Why are you keeping all that to yourself? Come on now!! Get it out!!

How important is your dream to you? What kind of actions can you take today to make your dream a reality?

“I’m dreaming of Christmas in Peru”

Peace and Love!

Iva ♥