intuitive angel card reader | self help author
judge, judging others, toxic people, no judging

8 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Judge People

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A true story about why you shouldn’t judge people

I want to share a story with you about what happened to me a few years ago. Quite a few years ago but the message is still powerful and strong. It’s about why we shouldn’t judge people.

I really detest people who judge others. Honestly!!

I’m gonna share this story with you now. I wonder if this has happened to any of you. Surely I’m not the only person this could have happened to!

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Why do we judge others based on appearance?

We all do it. Wait, I stand corrected, so many of us, to this day still judge others based on their appearance. I used to do it all the time. Volunteering at the homeless shelter cured me of that!

Yup. So check out how this happened to me and how furious I was about it.

My story

I go to the gym. I work out, I leave. I’m in “relax mode” kinda clothes. No make up on, my crazy big fro hair is pulled into a big fluffy mess on top of my head, I got cut off shorts on and a plain ole’ t shirt. Got the visual?

I’m a hot mess!!

I kinda look like I could be gardening or cleaning out a garage. Certainly not out shopping. And keep in mind also, I’m pretty inked up. Not that that should make a difference but read on…apparently it does.

I have a bit of running around to do before I head home to work, and one thing that I desperately need to do is go get a new pair of glasses. Mine are toast and my prescription is over 3 years old.

I’ve been putting this off for awhile now and it’s time to do it.

8 reasons you shouldn't judge people.

The Optical Store

Off I go, to optical stores. First place I go to, I walk in, the two store employees are talking among themselves, a few minutes in, not long, one greets me. She walks over to me, gives me a clear “once over” and asks if she can help me (yup you sure can). I shuddered. Her look was so condescending and almost humiliated me.

Right where she’s standing there’s an enclosed glass display of glasses, obviously the higher end ones, and she says “Well let’s move on down here, these ones are really expensive”. Um, OK. I think nothing of it at first because

I’m in total overwhelm at all the glasses I have to go through to choose one pair.

I have to tell you, a very important note, I despise shopping for glasses. I’d rather chew shards of glass dipped in cyanide. No really. It drives me crazy!! Like shopping for a bra is up there on the dislike list too. Ugh!

Anyway we’re looking, after way too long I pick out a couple of pairs (2 for 1 deal, gotta love that) and I head off to get my eye examination. I return to the store and prepare for my purchase. The girl who originally served me is out on break.

Before I finalize my purchase there is one thing I really want to do.

I want to see the expensive glasses dammit!!!

I need to look in the glass case that I was prohibited from shopping in because it was “too expensive”. There is a sweet pair of Versace’s. Now before we get too far into this please please know that I am NOT a label chaser. Far from it actually.

But I know who Versace is and these glasses are sweet!

And right then and there it hit me!!

The first store clerk looked at me and had decided that I couldn’t afford the glasses in the enclosed display.

How dare she? How dare she decide for me what I can and can’t afford? Who are you to judge me in such a heartless way?

Needless to say, I was horrified. I tried on those Versace’s and they looked super hot on me! But guess what? I won’t be buying them there. I actually won’t be returning there. I’m huge into customer service.

I don’t think insulting customers is a great way to treat them. Really.

Negative effects of judging others

This whole incident left such a horribly bad taste in my mouth. It also made me very sad. It made me sad to think that simply because of what I was wearing and probably the fact that I was covered in tattoos as well this girl thought I was poor and couldn’t afford nice glasses.

There are extremely negative effects of judging others and I think when we become aware of them, we might not be so quick to judge. Did you know that when you judge someone and they find out or know you are judging them it really hurts them?

Let’s get to the 8 reasons why you shouldn’t judge people

In no particular order of importance, here are my 8 reasons why you shouldn’t judge people and the 1 reason why you need to stop doing it right now.

1 We all have stories

Each and every one of us has a unique story that has made us who and what we are today. You don’t know someone’s story. You can’t form an educated opinion about them, nor judge them for who they are today.

2 This thing called respect

Did we lose this thing called respect? Why are we trash talking people instead of respecting them, regardless of who they are or what they did? We live in a society where it’s so much easier to point fingers and whisper than it is to learn and understand. And have respect.

3 Are you perfect?

You have no faults or demons in the closets? Or maybe it’s that you sin differently than others. Whatever the case may be, you are not perfect and flawless. How would you feel if someone judged you on some of your slight imperfections?

4 We all need compassion

Volunteering at the homeless shelter cured me of being a judgmental jerk. People need love and compassion. People need others to help and understand and respect them. We all just need and want to be understood and treated with empathy and compassion.

5 We all need love

We sure do. This whole world needs love. Love and understanding makes the world a better place. When you judge people you have no time to love them. I think that’s a Mother Teresa quote.

6 Stop the negativity already

Isn’t there enough negative stuff going on in the world today? People are so angry and so mean to each other. There is so much hate and jealousy and greed and selfishness. We need to stop all this and spread more love and positivity, not hate.

7 That could happen to you

Whatever just happened to that person you are pointing a finger and laughing at could easily happen to you. Don’t think so? Think again. The richest and smartest people have declared bankruptcy, gone homeless, become alcoholics. So ya, it could happen to you.

8 We’re all so unique and wonderful

People express themselves in so many different ways. Through ink, hairstyles, clothing, even the car they drive. This is what makes the world such a colourful and wonderful place. Can you imagine if we were all the same? Yawn!!!

Learn to embrace someone’s uniqueness and if you can’t, look away then.

And before we finish this up, let me share with you the 1 reason why you need to stop judging people right now.

Because it’s ugly and makes you ugly. Read that again.

Judging is negative and ugly. When you judge people you become ugly. As I mentioned earlier, there is so much ugly in the world right now, how about we start making it beautiful.

The world needs love and kindness. Healers and helpers. It’s hard to love and help when we’re too busy judging. Please stop. We all need love.

Did you love this post? Does what I share with you move you in any way shape or form? Do you love the blogs I share with you? If anything I have ever shared with you has inspired, motivated, empowered or enlightened you please consider supporting my work by buying me a coffee!!

A simple, small and lovely way to say “Thank you Iva”!! Click the button below. Thank you love you!! xoxo

Peace and Love!

Iva ♥

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4 Responses

  1. Love this post – not for what happened but for the fact that more people need this reminder…

  2. I was homeless for awhile I know what the looks look like. Sometimes it would make me cry. Love your quotes. Promise next time I will buy you a coffee!

    1. Thank you so much for reading Kathleen. xoxo I appreciate you :)

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Iva Ursano is a retired hairstylist turned badass freelancer, who left behind 52 years of her life in Northern Ontario, Canada for a life of freedom, love and beauty in sunny Guatemala. She has two main purposes in life: feed hungry bellies and help inspire people to live a life of joy and love.