intuitive angel card reader | self help author
change, change your life, life changing, moving on, be authentic, beliefs, personal growth, self improvement, life changing lessons, life lessons, inspirational blogs, motivational stories

6 Surprising Reasons Your Peeps Really Don’t Want You to Change.

Sharing is caring!

Them could be any one. Your husband/wife, daughter/son, mother/father. You get the idea. They don’t want you to change. They love you just the way you are. When you change anything in your life, it’s very very hard on them. It’s killin’ them actually (not literally). But why is you changing your life, so hard on them? I mean, it’s hard enough on you, let alone everyone around you.But fact remains, you change, they freak out.

I’m going to break this down a wee bit so you can understand it a little better and stay true to yourself and your personal growth. I want to first talk about your change.

Good for you!!!! You made the biggest and best decision in your life. To change. It’s hard isn’t it? Not only do YOU have to become accustomed to all the “changes” you are experiencing, but so does everyone else. And trust me, they ain’t happy about it.

5 shocking reasons your friends don't want you to change

Here’s why they don’t want you to change

You’re getting strange.

Not strange in the sense that you’ve become a weirdo (unless you have) but you’re different. Your behaviour is different. That thing you do with your hand, you know when you put it up almost like you’re saying “No”. That’s new…and strange, so strange. What do you mean, no?

Discomfort sets in.

You’re killin’ em.

Your balls are bigger

Like, when did you get balls anyway? Weren’t you just a submissive little mouse yesterday? Weren’t you the person who would answer to my beck and call extremely obediently? Wasn’t that you? I said “jump” and you would always reply “how high”. I wore the pants, not you. Now those pants fit you.

Fear sets in.

You’re killin’ em.

You wanna do what?

Him: Why don’t you want to sit on the couch with me and eat Cheezies, drink beer and watch the news?

Me: Why don’t you want to go for a walk after dinner?

This has been the norm for so long. It’s been fun. We love doing it. Why don’t you wanna do it anymore? I don’t want to go for a walk. I’m quite happy on the sofa, tyvm.

Abandonment sets in.

You’re killin’ em.

You’re going where?

Maybe it’s a career change you are seeking or a whole new playing field. Whatever it is you are going to do it and they’re freaking out. School? Oh. You want to be smarter than me? Volunteer? Oh. You have better things to do with people other than me? Move cities/countries/continents. Oh, you think you’re all worldly now?

Intimidation sets in.

You’re killin’ em.

You’re unrecognizable.

They’re freaking out. You are changing, growing and evolving into this strong wonderful magnificent person and they don’t know who you are. How are they supposed to act around you now? They don’t even know if they like you anymore. Maybe you guys aren’t compatible or connected anymore. Whatever bond or tie you had, has suddenly become very very thin. You aren’t the person they knew and loved anymore. They’re really not so sure they like you. You actually kinda make them feel insignificant.

Insecurity sets in.

You’re killin’ em.

But wait. Aren’t you happy for me?

Why yes. Yes of course. Some of them are. Definitely not all of them. The people who have grown accustomed to who we have been our whole lives have the hardest time with change. They want you to stay the same, forever. Don’t grow, or get smarter, or get stronger, and, most certainly, don’t you dare get more self confidence. Why can’t we just stay the losers we have been for all these years? Why do you want to improve your life? All that takes courage and commitment, dedication and discipline. We’ve never had any of that dammit, stop this nonsense.

They’re not happy for you. But…

All is not lost. You have that little cheerleading team over there yelling your name and high fiving you all the way home. Gotta love the mofos. They sincerely want you to continue your personal development growth and they will motivate you, inspire you and cheer you on all the way.

Stick with them. Not everyone is going to love your journey. It’s your journey. YOU love it and stick to it. Some people from your life will fall to the wayside, some will cheer you on and maybe even some others will join you.

Don’t forget, the most important ones will be there in the end.

Whose pants are these anyway?

Peace and Love


Sharing is caring!

2 Responses

  1. Unbelievable!.I’m going through that with my parents. As I grow older, wiser and am growing in my spiritual path. They take nasty jabs at me. It hurts do badly too. I have learned to separate myself for now. Thanks Iva xoxo! Love this blog! Great job!

    1. Ah ya family can be tough for sure Katie. Good for you for separating yourself :) that’s all you can do.

      xo iva xo

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


Iva Ursano is a retired hairstylist turned badass freelancer, who left behind 52 years of her life in Northern Ontario, Canada for a life of freedom, love and beauty in sunny Guatemala. She has two main purposes in life: feed hungry bellies and help inspire people to live a life of joy and love.