Wouldn’t it be nice if life was just smooth sailing all the time? No cares, no struggles, no trauma, no stress. A dream life, yes? Unfortunately, it doesn’t really go down like that. Getting through hard times can often be a challenge and exhausting for so many of us.
Really crappy things happen that send us flying backwards. Most of the time, things happen we simply don’t know how to handle or deal with. And we break. Hard.
We all deal with situations differently. Some let certain things just roll off their back while those same certain things could be terribly chaotic for others. It’s all in perspective.
For example, I may deal with a boyfriend breakup really hard while dealing with death is actually quite easy for me.
Getting through hard times in life- how bad is it?
To be honest, it all depends on the situation and how it affects you. I went through a crap ton of really sad stuff last year and each one was handled very differently. Some I am still hanging on to (ya I need to work on that) while others I let go of ages ago.
My mom’s death for example was ok with me as I’m happy she’s no longer suffering. However, the treatment I received by my family at my mom’s funeral was totally not ok with me and I’m still hurt by it. So how do I handle difficult times in life?
For me, getting through hard times is more of a learning lesson on how I’ll handle and grow from it.
I try to see everything through the eyes of love and forgiveness. It’s actually pretty easy to do though it does take awhile to be healed completely. And I’ll be honest, I may never get over the fact that I lost half my family last year but it’s a situation I’ve learned to just let go of.
It still hurts but it doesn’t consume me anymore.
You might really enjoy this video I made over on my new YouTube channel Women Blazing Trails. I talk about how I hit rock bottom and went through one of the most difficult times of my life and how I got through it.
Going through tough times makes you stronger
Like a million times stronger. You may feel really weak while you’re getting through hard times and it also may feel like you will never get over it.
I think the most important thing to remember is that, yes, you will get through it but also, you will learn a lot about not only yourself but the people around you. Especially your family and people you call friends.
I think it’s important to take each of life’s tragedies, struggles, issues, etc and learn and grow from them. There is a lesson in everything we go through and a reason why everything happens to us.
You may not know the reason immediately but it will certainly reveal itself to you one day. You’ll see. Instead of playing victim and crying the “oh poor me blues” for forever (which I did for years), take your trauma, grieve through it, embrace it, heal from it and then pay attention to how life unfolds for you.
If you stay the victim, life will be hard for you. If you heal and grow you will see how going through hard times makes you stronger and perhaps an inspiration or role model for someone who is going through the same thing you did, and needs help.
Does that make sense?
When we go through hard times we want to run away
Amirite? We stomp our feet and cry “why me”??? What did I do to deserve this? Why is this happening to me right now at this moment in my life?
We have a million questions. There basically are no answers to be honest. I take each difficult time as just another lesson from the Universe. A test from God if you will.
One thing you have to keep in mind when times get hard is life never promised to be easy and the way we handle stressful situations will set the tone for our lives and to prepare us for more tough times. I mean let’s face it, we can’t keep running and hiding from hard times and we can’t keep playing the victim.
Neither option serves us well. Getting through hard times and coming out as a victor is how we grow and learn.
How do you get through hard times?
I admire those people who can get through hard times like a champ. As I mentioned earlier, depending on what the situation is, I can deal super effectively or it can tear me down for awhile.
You have to remember that in the end, everything will always work out. Your handling of any situation will either make you or break you. And trust me, I’ve been broken quite a few times but I can look back now on some of the times that just about killed every ounce of my spirit and realize there was a powerful lesson in it.
Also I realized that some things I went through were meant to save me from something worse. Remember that.
I also realized that sometimes hard times are put in our path to wake us up and force us to make some serious life changes. That’s icky and uncomfortable but the Universe sees the path we are on and wants us to rethink it. It knows that the way we are headed is not for our higher good.
The Universe is smart like that.
Before we get to the 9 profound thoughts to remember to help you get through hard times I just want to share the 21 Day Challenge that I created to help you change your life and help you get back on track.
Also check out my mini self help eBook series You Are Amazing. Over 10 powerful self help books to help you get through whatever difficult time you are dealing with now.
You Are Amazing-Self help books
Getting through hard times-9 things to remember
1 Look for the good
I get that that can be really hard to do in the moment, but try to find the good, any good, in the situation you are going through. It won’t be easy, or it may, but it will help lesson the blow of the situation you are going through. There’s a reason for, and good in, everything we go through.
2 Everything is temporary, the bad and the good
Tough times suck, I get that, but remember that it won’t last. Everything in life, including life, is temporary. There’s a quote that goes something like this:
In a year from now the things you are worrying about today won’t even matter
…or something like that. It’s just a simple quote and reminder that things end, bad and good.
3 Find the lesson and learn it
You weren’t given this hard time to make you cave, crumble and crash. You were given it because there is a lesson in it for you. Take the time to find out what the lesson is. Be open minded about it. Pay attention to the signs and how your life has changed/is changing because of this situation.
Not everything that happens to you is meant to hurt you. Some of it is meant to fix or help you.
4 You’re stronger than you think you are
Yes, you really are. I get that at the time you feel like dying and you’re not sure how much more you can handle, but trust me, you can handle it. What you are going through was placed before you to make you stronger.
Not weaker. Dig deep and find your strength. That’s how we grow.
5 Be kind to you
You’re not a loser. This isn’t happening because ‘only bad things happen to me’ (unless you keep telling yourself that, then yes, only bad things will happen to you), you’re not a failure. God isn’t punishing you.
Stop saying any and all of those negative things to yourself. Be gentle and kind to yourself. And look forward to the victory when it’s all said and done.
6 Things change quickly
Like sometimes within an hour. You could be going through something absolutely horrible right now and then in the same day you get a phone call and everything changes, for the better. Just like that.
You’ll be surprised at what or who comes out of the woodwork when you are going through a hard time. Stay open to receive.
7 Lose the drama and toxic people
Unfortunately, sometimes though our friends and family mean well, they do more harm than good. It’s nice to have loving and supportive people around you when you are going through a hard time but it’s not so nice when they are full of drama and negativity towards it.
Not everyone will understand your feelings or what you are going through. You certainly don’t need more fuel to add to the fire. Ignore the Debbie Downers and Negative Nancy’s at this time.
8 Not getting what you want is a stroke of luck
You may have had your heart set on this job/relationship/trip or whatever and worked your butt off to get it but it didn’t happen for you. I get it. It’s sad and traumatic. But not everything we want is meant for us. Don’t forget that.
I know I talk about the Universe a lot but it just knows. It knows what’s best for you and what isn’t. Consider it a blessing that you didn’t get what you hoped for.
9 Find gratitude in everything
Yes even the hard times. Whether you want to or not, find something to be grateful for in the situation. There is always something to be grateful for, no matter how bad things are right now.
Gratitude also helps us calm down and take a step back and see that what we are going through isn’t so bad after all. Just say thank you.
Difficult times don’t last
No matter what you are going through in your life right now, remember these things:
- it’s temporary
- learn the lesson
- grow from it
- don’t play victim
- don’t hang on to it forever
- you will find out who your real friends are
- stay true to you
Life is not easy but it doesn’t have to be a difficult hell ride either. It’s up to you to make or break it or let it make or break you. Choose wisely. I want to share one more thing with you.
This is a very famous quote about difficult times that I absolutely love.
“One day you will tell your story of how you overcame what you went through and it will be someone else’s survival guide”
This is a Brene Brown quote (I think). You might like this article:
I hope this article and these 9 tips will help you during your next difficult time or one you are going through right now.
Getting through hard times builds character
Ya I know, you don’t care. Lol.
And then there’s that quote:
“Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”!
Ya we don’t care about that either and we don’t want to be stronger anymore. Do you feel me? But I need you to read the quote above again one more time. The survival guide one.
Your story is someone else’s survival guide. There’s so much power in that. We all heal from each other. We are all here to help, guide and love each other.
Never forget that no matter what difficult time you are going through right now, you’re gonna make it through and you’re gonna be ok.
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