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How to Conquer Your Fears in 10 Fun Thoughts

Last Updated on 2 years by Iva Ursano

You already know that fear is the number one killer of all dreams and desires, right? I talk about this beast all the time. Fear sucks the life out of us. Yup it does. That’s why I want to show you how to conquer your  fears, all of them, so you can live the life you really truly want.

But first…

Let’s talk a bit about fear so we can understand it and how absolutely ridiculous it really is….but it really isn’t either.

What is fear?

Fear is an ugly dark monster that lurks inside of us. I think it has only one eye, so it’s a cyclops looking thing. It is black and slimy. It has two arms and two legs but only 3 fingers and 3 toes on each.

And, wait, get this, it doesn’t have a belly button. Ugh!!!

Fear is a bully. Now, if you were that ugly you would be a bully too.

But I want you to view fear as a fictional monster. When we look at it like it’s some sort of cartoon character we can see it in a different light and then your whole perception of it changes.

Have I convinced you yet? No? Ok let me put it to you another way, perhaps a more logical and scientific way.

Fear is a defense mechanism built in so that we are protected from scary things that may hurt us, cause us pain, either physical or emotional, and keep us from feeling like a failure or a loser.

How’s that? A tad more in your face but when I break it down like that you can sort of understand it better. Fear is really only trying to protect us from scary stuff. That’s it that’s all. But in protecting us, it is also keeping us from doing some pretty cool stuff too.

Fear of failure is the most evil one

I think we all have this fear and the thought of failing at anything ever, scares all of us. We don’t want to look stupid. We don’t want people to laugh at us. We don’t want our family and friends to think we are failures or disappointments or worse yet, losers.

I totally get all that. I have come to the point in my life where I don’t really gaf what people think of me and my actions anymore. Neither should you.

I like to dispel the myth that we are failures if we try something new and it didn’t work. Listen up:

YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE!! You are amazing for even trying! Most don’t even get that far. 

So I need you to, right now, flick your fear of failure and lose that as one of your excuses please.

Fear and anxiety go hand in hand

Trust me, I so get this. Fear causes anxiety and then anxiety causes all kinds of icky things and feelings that we hate and then we just end up in the corner of the room in a ball crying. Ok maybe not that bad but you get the idea.

Lemme give you an example:

For years I wanted to go ziplining and then the opportunity to do it finally arrived. I was excited and terrified at the same time. To be honest, I had a million more feelings, not many of them good. I was scared out of my tree.

BUT….I really really wanted to go ziplining. So I did.

Now once we hiked across 5 high swing bridges (hello freak out!!!!!) and got to the first launch pad I was pretty sure I was going to drop dead of a heart attack right there and then. Looking across the sky hundreds of feet in the air and I was so sure I couldn’t pull this off

BUT….I did because I really really wanted to go ziplining. Fear and anxiety almost had me taking off my cables and my gear and walking back down to the parking lot but I didn’t.

And I didn’t die. And I loved it so much I went one more time. It was the most exhilarating thing I’ve ever done in my life. See what happened? I overcame my fears, took a big deep breath and did it.

I know you can too.

I think you might really like this YouTube video I did over on my channel about how to conquer your fears. While you’re there, don’t forget to hit that Subscribe button!

How to conquer your fears in 10 fun thoughts

So let’s look at some of the reasons to overcome fears so you all can live a life of crazy ridiculous joy because that’s what happens. For real. You face a fear, you feel triumphant. You face another fear, you feel brave and courageous. You face another fear….you get the idea.

Before we get into how to conquer your fears in 10 simple thoughts/steps I want you to take a minute and check out my new signature course, The 21 Day Challenge. If you’re ready, I mean super ready, to change your life, face fears, and live the life you deserve, this challenge is for you!! 

Click here for more info and join the challenge today!!

Here are 10 things to think to help you conquer your fears

1. Stop questioning your ability

We all do that. A lot. Question our ability to try something new and hard.

You’ve never done this before, right? Is it possible? Am I capable of taking this on? Fear will always stop you and make you ask yourself a million questions.

See here’s the thing, do you want to spend the rest of your life questioning your abilities? Oh hell no! Give it a thought for a minute and then challenge yourself. Tell yourself that even though we may not know how, right now, to do this thing, we’re gonna give it a go!!

Successful people find answers.

2. Accept the challenge

Fear, you’re on. Fear doesn’t think you are going to do anything. It thinks it’s way smarter than you. It also thinks it has way more power than you.

Trust me, it doesn’t. It’s only power is in the way it smells. Pee-ew!! Remember what it looks like?

So talk yourself into this. You’ve done hard things before. Many. You can do this one too!

Successful people take on challenges with vigor.

3. Push the envelope

Now that you’ve accepted the challenge, you are looking for envelopes to push. You are determined now to prove this bugger wrong.

You now know that no matter what the challenge, how big the envelope, you are going to smash it. period.

Successful people push the limits.

4. Be determined

Can you remember the last time you felt this much determination? You suddenly have a new lease on life. A new purpose. A new vision for your future.

You are hell bent and determined to prove to this little monster that you can do whatever you set your mind to.

Successful people have determination.

5. Sense of humour

Oh yes, you need a sense of humour to deal with this ugly little monster. He’s gonna poke at you and mock you and you just need to flick him away and laugh right back at him.

I mean you gotta laugh at him, he’s so ugly he’s almost cute. You have to laugh.

Successful people know when to laugh and keep it light.

6. Make a plan

You know you have a big challenge ahead, and you got fear poking at you telling you it’s impossible. Get your pad and pen and start drafting up a plan. You already know you can do this, but how?

Let’s make a plan.

Successful people try to figure things out.

7. The big picture

You need to stop and look at the big picture. What is the result you are aiming for? What is your end goal? What do you stand to benefit from achieving this thing?

You have to remember what your end goal is. Fear will have to take a back seat.

Successful people know how big their why is and will not stop until they achieve it.

8. I did THAT?

Oh yes you did. When you push yourself, push the envelope, face fear and flick it away and then actually succeed in setting out what you wanted to do, you can look back with huge pride.

Woot!! Look at you go!! You’re unstoppable now.

Successful people love the feeling of pride in themselves.

9. You’re my idol

You’re going to hear that a lot. People are going to start looking up to you. They are going to be in awe of you. And all that is going to make you feel damn good.

And you are going to want to keep doing inspirational stuff. Trust me on this one.

Successful people love to help others and be role models.

10. Sweet victory is now yours

You’ve got it. That one big bad scary goal you’ve been talking about and thinking about for so long is now yours. You can enjoy it now. You’ve fought, pushed, cried, struggled and did unimaginable things to get it.

What a trip that was.

Successful people love to celebrate all the victories!!

Successful people overcome fears

It’s not just success in jobs or money or career, it’s about being successful in all areas of your life. It’s about embracing all that life has to offer, learn how to conquer your fears and go live the life you desire and deserve.

Listen, we aren’t here for a mediocre life. I mean, you can have that if you want but why would you want that anyway?

Look at all the good stuff you get from fear, or should I say, when you overcome your fears and show it who is boss. Don’t let fear get in the way of the ridiculously joyful life you are meant to live.

I’ve shown you how to conquer your fears, now go get ’em!!

Warrior! Wanna go wrestle some alligators?

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Peace and Love


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  1. Hi, Iva

    No one can escape the emotion of “Fear”. The fear factor will be at its highest level when we handle new project. It is human nature to doubt about our ability to handle that.

    In my opinion, the best remedy to handle “fear” is to take action, Even a little tiny step will do the trick. Just as you said the level of fear is reduced as the process progress.

    Nice post, Iva

    Have a nice week ahead!

    Stella Chiu

    1. Thanx Stella. Always nice to have you drop by! And you’re right, small steps will do as well!! :D

  2. i like Stella’s comments of small steps, Iva, for conquering fear. small steps and big why’s. writing for an audience scares me but when I connect to the bigger purpose of teaching and inspiring others, I push through the fear.

    some solid tips here from a woman who has undoubtedfly faced and conquered many of your fears :)

    1. Hey Vishnu nice to see you here. Stella is spot on about taking small steps. I try to but sometimes find myself diving right in with blinders on and I still come out ok :).

      1. I just read this as I was reading I took a moment to think and I thought I was reading about my middle she just lost her husband…she is a widow now.I realized I was reading about myself…I was a widow with 3 little girls…I knew I couldn’t do it be myself…I was so afraid…as I read this ..I read about myself and fear and As I look around right now …I kicked fears butt!!!
        Everyone needs fear in order to live life to its fullest ☆
        Thank you for writing this ♡

        1. YOU are awesome Dusti and thank you for your comment. I face fear and kick it to the curb all the time :) Glad you enjoyed the article xo

  3. I forgot everything
    Author’s style n imagination n the way of expression is so so impressive
    I forgot to focus on his/her material
    N begin enjoying the flow n playful words for a while
    I wish everything we are ever told to be like this
    Like our inner self in a friendly way is teaching us?
    N that when the fear is pictured as a monster without belly button?
    ? This is so powerful
    With this
    We frame the word fear in a way where it is something useless n helpless without the concern we give it/them replacing the frame that threaten us for Life???
    Ty xyz u made my day

    1. Awe thanx for the great comment and all the love xoxoxo

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