How to Stop Worrying and Start Living the Life You Deserve
Last Updated on 3 years by Iva Ursano
I’m a dreamer. A big dreamer. Lemme tell ya though, dreaming big is scary. I dream of winters in hot tropical places (goodbye Sudbury winter!!), traveling the world, burning up the highway in a hot convertible, having a drop dead gorgeous husband (hello Johnny Depp), standing on a big stage talking to thousands of people.
Yup, it’s scary to dream big and we worry too much about it but I’ve discovered how to stop worrying and live the life I want and deserve!
Worrying about what others think of us and our dreams
Dreaming big is scary. I’m not quite sure who coined the phrase “If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough” but I totally live by that saying now. You see, I don’t dream big just for the hell of it. Nope not this girl.
I dream big with full intention of seeing my dreams come to fruition. Yup. Each and every one of them. Why not? I mean, what else am I going to do with this big beautiful life of mine besides chase dreams?
But if you’re anything like me, or like I used to be, I used to worry alot about what others thought of me and my big scary dreams. Would they think I was stupid or crazy or that I’m being ridiculous or that I have my head in the clouds?
We worry ourselves to death about this dream or goal that we have, or what people think of us, and the end result is that we put it on the back burner because we don’t think we can reach it.
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We have to stop worrying and start living!
We waste so much of our time living in fear and worrying so much about stuff that it’s almost ridiculous. Many of these fears are ingrained at an early age.
Our parents could have warned us about something that may have been dangerous or too risky to do so we never did it. We may have failed at something in life once or twice and because of that, we have totally given up on trying new things.
Life is about learning and growing. How will you grow and evolve if you stay in your comfort zone and waste all your time worrying about stuff that probably won’t even happen!?
As I started on my personal development journey a few years back I ran across some valuable tools and eBooks that totally changed my life and my mindset.
These amazing eBooks helped me stop worrying
Many of us have either heard of or read The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. Excellent book. I’ve read it a couple of times. The Magic was just as good, as was The Power. Kudos to Rhonda for these inspirational and motivational masterpieces!
Here’s the full collection of her amazing books. I’ve read 3 of them and just may get one more soon!
The Secret Series-4 Book Collection
They opened my eyes to dreaming and believing that I can have anything in the world that I want and know that I deserved it all. That was ground-breaking for me. I deserve it? Really? Outstanding!!
And so it began. My dreams started small and I realized that I was actually manifesting the things that I wanted. The little things. I was asking the Universe for things, putting my intention out there and they were happening for me.
Then my dreams got bigger. And bigger. And then it almost became an addiction (is that even possible?) As my dreams got bigger, my faith started to waiver a bit. That’s bold, Iva. That’s too big, Iva. What on earth are you thinking, Iva?
I had to let go of worry and change my mindset
Yes my dreams got bigger and I got scared. How the heck am I gonna pull this one off? I would tell my friends about one dream and they would just give me one of those “yes of course” looks and change the subject. No one would believe that I can do this.
If they don’t think I can, then why should I think I can?
Yup I was starting to get scared. I would start to worry even a little. But then…..
Boom!!
I had an A-HA moment. Why can’t I do this? Why can’t I have that? The Universe and God said that I am deserving of all my heart’s desires. God said I can have anything I want as long as I stay in faith.
Where’s your faith, Iva? Dream BIG for goodness sake! Your dreams are free. I had to learn to stop worrying about everything and just let goooooooo!
Yes my dreams are big!
Scary, yes, but free! Now don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I’m some sort of crazed thrill seeker always pushing the envelope and living on the edge. Not quite.
But I do like to think outside the box and say “Why not?”
There’s this huge part of me that’s longing for excitement and adventures. There’s also another part of me that absolutely does NOT want to be old and full of regrets. No way.
Learning to face fears, stop worry and take a leap of faith
Lemme share a story with you.
I’ve always wanted to write a book. I had never written a book in my life. The only thing I had ever written was letters to ex boyfriends who behaved badly.
But I knew without a shadow of a doubt I wanted to write a book. So I did.
I didn’t care if anyone would like it, read it, buy it or whatever. The fact that I finally checked off one dream on my dream list was good enough for me. I took a leap of faith and did it.
I put worry and fear to the side and you know what happened? I felt absolutely freaking amazing that I accomplished this! There was no regret. No fear. No worry.
I just did it. So can you!
I went on to write a couple more books after that too! You can see them here:
How to stop worrying about the future
I learned to retrain my brain.
That’s the key right there. You have to train your brain to stop worrying and start thinking of possibilities. You have to let go, let God and have faith.
I know, easier said than done. If everything was easy everyone would be doing it.
I’ve learned that I can’t control everything and I don’t have to control everything. There are powers, much higher powers, in the heavens and the Universe that have everything under control for me.
Finding the strength to have faith in that took some time for me and I may not quite have 100 % total faith yet but I’m close. When I feel my faith wavering I am reminded to *let go and let God*. When I do this, I take a deep breath and relax. He’s got this!
Don’t believe in God? That’s cool. Believe in the Universe then if you will. You have to know that everything is energy and whatever energy you are putting out into the Universe is coming right back to you.
If you put out worry, you’ll get back more things to worry about.
If you put out hope, faith, joy and love, well, you guessed it. You’ll get more of that good stuff come back to you.
See how this works? Isn’t it amazing!?
You have to stop worrying about the things you can’t control
There are very few things we can control. Your mind is one of them. YOU have control over your thoughts and mind. Only you. You have to remember that the life you are living now, you have created with your thoughts.
As soon as you learn to control your mind and your thoughts, worry will take a back seat and you will finally start living the life you deserve. A life of inner peace, freedom, joy and abundance.
You’ll see. Trust me on this one.
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Peace and Love
Iva
Hi, Iva. I’m right there with you. I’m a big dreamer. I started picking images for my vision board again. I see crazy stuff in my dreams. I know my husband thinks I’m nuts and it’s a matter of time before I’m going back to trying to find a job to make ends meet. This month I asked for $600 just to cover my ends for the bills. That’s it. I already made $32 and so change for writing a blog post. I don’t know where the rest is coming I just know it’s on its way. I want to make 6 figures doing what I love which is writing. I’m with you and I’m watching The Secret again because I wanted to get myself ready. When I was really into all kinds of things started happening, but I lost my way after a relationship went south. Never again, you’re not crazy, and neither am I. What good are dreams if they don’t scare you? The nightmare is waking up to the same dull existence day after day after day.
Atta girl Bonnie!! I always believe that things are always working out for me, no matter what, and they do!! Like magic :) xoxo
I loved this article and would love to pass it on to someone I know who would probably get some help from reading it; however, I would never pass on anything that had disgusting language in it. Why would anyone who is intelligent enough to write such a wonderful article have to describe a fearful emotional response as “F—ing scary”, instead of just plain scary, or frightfully scary, or any other descriptive combination of words that would decently describe the feeling in a way that didn’t appear to come from a dirty gutter?
Thanx for your lovely comment Theta and I’m glad you liked the article. Did you know that intelligent people are the ones who swear the most? That’s what sets us apart from the rest ;) If I used the words you suggested then I wouldn’t be writing authentically and that’s what life is all about. Being yourself, loving who you are, not having to pretend you’re someone you’re not to make everyone else happy.
Your opinion matters Theta, unfortunately not to me.
Dirty gutter? smh.
Hello Iva. My mission in life is to make this a better world via the use of authenticated scientific discovery, not by me but by connection with some of the “finer minds” of the world with whom i have either been personally connected, or from their published work. My intent at this time is to create a program entitled PEACE IS THE PATH & LOVE IS THE WAY with which to raise funding for multiple but related programs necessary to bring about peace. I now have over 215 boards up on Pinterest as a draft form for the film. And i am attempting to identify “just people” who stand out on that platform as being leaders in different aspects needed to make up the components of peace. And i am making progress in this respect and have a site up on Pinterest at this time with over 215 boards as we speak to these different aspects of peace and deliberate on how to move people from a war mentality into one based peace. Not an easy task. But in looking for leaders in different fields, i came across you site. And what drew me in initially was you post/course on how to create a site such as you have which will allow donations to be taken in. And, as i browsed your site and learned more about you i began to notice simularities in thought — in particular that of religion and spirituality, which is a biggie with me, yet rare to find. So my intent with this correspondence is to explore the potential of meeting with you privately on a venue such as Zoom since at this time, i am in quarantine in California and you are, it seems, in Mexico. I have left my email address here so as to receive correspondence from your organization and am in hopes it can be utilized for you to connect with me. I am reluctant to leave a phone number here. Unfortunately i am not very computer literate which is a big drawback at this time although i am very well informed and in many different areas related to human consciousness and all of its many facets. Thank you for providing this space on the web which provides so much knowledge and assistance for others.
Thanx!! I’ve emailed you :)