Last Updated on 4 years by Iva Ursano
The new year is fast approaching. I can’t even believe it’s already Christmas. I sit here alone and type this out for you on Christmas day. I’m alone this year. I celebrated last night with some of my expat friends here in Guatemala.
Fun was had by all. I knew I’d be working today but that’s ok. When you love what you do it’s not work.
(this was an original post from 2018 and has been updated for 2019)
So I’ve been sitting here reflecting on the holidays, the last week of December and the work I need to do and also reflecting on the last year. 2019 was a trip, amirite? Phew.
Such an interesting mix of good and bad. I can’t say I had more bad than good but I certainly had some distressing moments. Here are the ones that stand out in my mind:
- my mom died in February
- my son’s father committed suicide in August
- I started smoking again (ugh)
- I moved countries again (Mexico this time)
- me and a few family members stopped talking to each other
So you can see, I had some rough patches. I’m still struggling with a few of them, the ones that are in my control, like smoking and getting my earnings back up. The rest are out of my control.
Ah well, those are behind me now.
I don’t make it a habit of wallowing in the sorrow of days gone by. Neither should you. What’s done is done. Take what you need from the situation and leave the rest.
Anyway, I look back and think about all the things I’ve learned and all the things I need to carry with me in the new year.
I’d like to share them with you. And, like me, take what you need and leave the rest.
6 Lessons to Take With You in the New Year
Immerse yourself in learning new things.
I’ve taken courses, read pdf’s and eBooks, watched YouTube tutorials and webinars, you name it, I did it. I used to hate learning anything new. I always thought it was too time consuming and I was too dumb. Both are false. The things you learn are valuable and will help you on your journey in life, whatever that may be.
Take some time each week to learn something new. You never know when you’re going to need it or how useful it will be for you in the future. And you aren’t dumb either. You can learn anything you put your mind to.
Use your voice more often
Stop letting people walk all over you. Stop letting people take advantage of you. If you say yes and mean to say no start saying no. Learn to value yourself and your time. Take a thick black magic marker and draw a solid boundary line between you and others.
Stand up for what you believe in. Don’t agree with everyone just for the sake of fitting in or to avoid an argument. Find your voice and use it. Speak up and speak out. People will learn to listen and respect you more.
Get up fast when you’ve been kicked down
I’ve been kicked more times than I can count. Every new year I always start with “oh this is gonna be the best year ever” and then month after month something stops me or kicks me down. Nothing keeps me down. I wipe away my tears, brush off my butt and get back up fiercer than before.
When something doesn’t go our way, it’s the Universe keeping us from something that is no longer good for us or trying to get our attention and steer us in another direction. Things happen for a reason.
Sorry to have to throw that cliche at you but it’s true.
We may not find out the reason for a very long time. That’s ok. Just get back up anyway, rethink your strategy and start something else.
Stop guarding your heart
Stop being afraid of love and holding back on love. There is nothing bad or ugly about love. Everything about love is beautiful. I loved a man who I knew was eventually going to leave me. It didn’t matter. I loved him anyway and it was one of the best relationships I’ve ever had. I will never regret that love.
I grew so much as a person because of it.
Love is to be felt, enjoyed and shared. Don’t regret anything about love and stop locking up your heart. You’re only depriving yourself of the most beautiful feeling in the world. Yes, sometimes hurt comes after love. Love is still more beautiful and powerful than any hurt. Embrace love.
Push the envelope
Go knock on doors you wouldn’t normally knock on. Say yes to things, events and opportunities that you normally would say no to. Tackle new projects head on. Jump at chances that are placed before you.
Step outside of your comfort zone and start having more faith in your abilities.
We say no to new adventures or opportunities because of lack of self confidence. We don’t think we’re good enough, smart enough or whatever enough. You most certainly are good enough.
Say yes more to things in the new year and figure out how to do them later. The answers will come. Trust me on that.
Leave the pain behind
Whoever or whatever hurt you in 2019 or previous years must be left behind. Holding on to all this pain serves you no good whatsoever. Pain is very debilitating and heavy. You will never be free to move forward in the new year or with your life if you keep hanging on to pain and grudges.
Do yourself a big favour. Release it all now. Forgive those who hurt you. Write yourself an open letter to all who have hurt you ( I call them truth letters), pour out all your anger and hatred, and then let it go. Burn or shred the letter and move on.
You have got to get rid of this pain once and for all. You’re only hurting yourself more and more.
This is by far one of the best ways to free yourself from anger, hurt and pain. This is what I do when I have to write an open letter to anyone who hurt me.
- sit quietly with no distractions
- turn on some nice soft music and light candles or burn essential oil (lavender is best)
- notepad and pen or computer in Word, whatever, just start writing
- get out all the hurt, the things that annoyed you and made you angry
- write until you can’t write anymore
- read it back, cry your eyes out, breathe deep and then
- burn it!
Trust me on this one, you will never feel so much liberation until you do this. This is one of the best forgiveness and release techniques I have ever done. Try it and see.
New year new me!!
Remember, it’s new year new me time, right? It’s important to look back at what went wrong, what went right and what didn’t go at all. Take all these things, evaluate them and formulate a new plan and stick to it!!
You don’t want a repeat of 2019 (unless of course your 2019 was magnificent and mind blowing!).
If you’re ready to move forward in the new year with a new attitude and piss and vinegar and need a little help or direction, you may want to check out my self help guide. It is jam packed with actionable tips and tricks to get you on the right path to the life you deserve!!
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