intuitive angel card reader | self help author
grief, break up rules, attitude, self love, self respect, forgiveness, loneliness, hurt, sadness

5 Breakup Rules That Will Save You From a Ton of Grief

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It’s break up time. Good grief. You were sure this guy/gal was the one you were going to spend the rest of your life with. Remember those first few months when everything was so beautiful and full of love and roses and sweet lovemaking?

What happened and when did it happen? Breaking up sucks and it comes with tons of grief, that is, if you don’t do it properly

We are now ready to break up or have already. If there were rules in the relationship that got broken, take note. There are definitely rules in the break up. These rules should not be broken. Ever.

You think you two are going to still be friends.  Right? Whose idea was that? Let’s just be friends.

It never works. That will only work if you guys live two countries away from each other. So what are the top 5 break up rules? Pay attention.

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A relationship break up is never easy

We all know how it feels. The break up is brutal. The feelings. The sadness. The anger. Oy. The roller coaster of emotions we have to go through is enough to drive anyone crazy.

I’m no stranger to bad relationships and break ups but in my years I’ve learned a few things that make ending a relationship just so much easier, not only on me but the other guy too ( I think).

You know you made the right decision to end the relationship but that doesn’t make the heartache any easier either. Your heart aches, you want to go back to the way everything was in the beginning. You want all that blissful romance and the butterflies in your tummy feeling back again.

But you know it’s not going to happen.

It’s really hard to try and stay strong and stick to your guns too! The heart, though is such a strong muscle, is also weak too. I feel ya girl.

We have to remember why we left and we have to remind ourselves that there is definitely something better for us after this break up.

Sometimes we simply are just afraid of leaving a relationship. Fear of hurting the other person, fear of the future. I found this great video on YouTube that discusses this. I think you might really like it.

5 break up rules you should follow

So let’s just get to the rules and I really do hope you stick to some of them or even all of them!! I wrote this for you. To help you move on in peace and happiness.

Delete delete delete

And you know exactly what I’m talking about. Phone number, email address (unless you need that info for lawyers or children). Any way you can contact this person, delete it. Otherwise, you are just going to end up driving yourself crazy.

Why aren’t they answering your text? How come they are ignoring your phone messages? Did they receive my email? Why won’t they reply?

You wanna know why? Because they are moving on with their life and they really don’t want to maintain contact with you. Get the hint. Leave them alone. Save yourself some grief here. Stop driving yourself crazy, and move on.

You might really like this mini self help eBook I wrote on how to cut cords of attachment because let’s face it, sometimes we don’t want to let go, but we have to. Click the link or the image below to download your copy now.

How to Cut Cords of Attachment

woman walking away-how to cut cords of attachment

Their friends

Read that again. Their friends are their friends. Not yours.

Now sometimes it is possible to maintain a friendship with them (their friends) even after the break up but if you do, do NOT ever ask how your ex is. Actually don’t talk about your ex at all with them. and don’t maintain a friendship so you can spy on your ex.

That’s just wrong and that’s not very nice, really. Grow up. Move on.

No bashing

And I know that’s really hard to do. Trust me I get it. It’s hard to not bash their name to anyone who will listen BUT please refrain. No matter how bad or evil they were. No matter how poorly they treated you. Be a better and bigger person.

Remember you stayed for as long as you did because there was some good in there too somewhere. No bashing. Let it go.

And let’s be honest here, I’m sure you weren’t the perfect person in the relationship either. We all have faults. Sorry.

No whining

I did this. Oh, how I did this. Endlessly.

It was exhausting and I’m surprised I have friends left. Don’t call all your friends and whine and cry and complain every day about the break up.

If you need to talk about it, call the one or two friends who love you to smithereens and don’t mind listening to you and then have a hug and a drink. But for the love of God and everything holy, don’t go on and on to anyone who will listen about how bad your life is now that so and so dumped you.

You will just be known as the whiner and no one will want to be around you.

Of course, we all want to tell our story and cry the blues and that’s totally ok. Just don’t make it all you ever talk about.

Don’t look for a replacement right away

You know, that whole rebound love thing. Ya, that. Good grief! Don’t do that. It’s just a bad idea.

You aren’t ready for a new love. Whether you think you are or not, trust me, you aren’t. You need to do a little bit of work on yourself. Go over what happened and why.

Think about who you are and how you can avoid this kind of thing from happening again. Plus, you may need to work on some self love. Jus sayin’.

I wrote an eBook on how to love yourself (naturally!) and you may like it. Click the link below to grab your copy now.

How to Love Yourself 

Knowing what to say to break up with someone

It’s hard af, right? It’s actually downright nerve-wracking. I have a super hard time communicating my feelings in person so I always have to write a letter and hope that it is received well (ooph).

But the most important thing is to be honest and clear. Explain to your partner that it’s done and you’re moving on.

Now if you are in a toxic relationship where maybe your partner is really good at emotionally manipulating you, you must stick to your guns, no matter how hard that will be.

Narcissistic partners can be especially hard to deal with and leave. If you are trapped in a relationship with a narcissist that you really need to get away from please check out this program by Kim Saeed. She’s amazing and so are her courses.

Click here or the image below to check out her programs to see if they are right for you.

break up rules blog-woman with her hands in freedom

Follow these break up rules to move on happily ever after

Yes, breaking up sucks. Big time. But if you follow these break up rules ending the relationship may go smoother than you think. There comes a point during the aftermath that you simply have to let go and move on.

You deserve happiness and inner peace. Not grief and torment. Remember that.

Did you like this post? Did it help you in any way shape or form? If so, you can now say “thank you iva!!” and buy me a coffee to show your support and gratitude. :)

If you love listening to in your face inspirational podcasts, you might like mine! The No Holds Barred podcast is available on 10 different platforms. Click here to give it a listen and subscribe!

Peace and Love


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Iva Ursano is a retired hairstylist turned badass freelancer, who left behind 52 years of her life in Northern Ontario, Canada for a life of freedom, love and beauty in sunny Guatemala. She has two main purposes in life: feed hungry bellies and help inspire people to live a life of joy and love.