You know, we’re not stupid people. Really we’re not. We can spot a phony person a mile away. We can also sense negative and toxic behaviours. We can. I know we can. Our spidey senses kick in and we get an icky feeling in our belly.
You know what I’m talking about.
Yet for some reason, we ignore our gut instincts that clearly tell us to back the fuck away. Why do we do that?
Well, I’m no psychologist or anything but I honestly think we do this out of intrigue and curiosity. “Oh that lady oozes toxicity but I really need to find out why and learn more about her”. Ever catch yourself saying this sometimes? Admit it, you do (or maybe that’s just me?).
Fast forward a few weeks, months, years later and this toxic person is still in our life. Why? Because now we almost feel trapped and we just can’t break away. Do yourself a favour. Break away. Now.
Many of us think toxic behaviour is physical violence, verbal abuse or any other kind of lashing out like that. But there’s more to it than that. Here is my list of some toxic behaviours that I think you should steer clear of, especially in a relationship. If your partner is doing any of these things, and counselling is out of the question, it’s time to go.
This is a big no no and very toxic. In my personal experience, controllers almost always have no control over their own life and blame others for everything that is wrong. Because of this, they need to control others as it gives them some sense of accomplishment. Don’t let anyone control you, ever. This is your life, not theirs.
Oh how this hurts my heart when people do this. None of us are perfect. Who are we to judge? One of my family members used to do this all the time and it drove me bat shit crazy. He was so mean and ignorant and always saying rude things about other people. Please don’t do this and if you are around people who are doing this, walk away. It’s negative energy.
Yuck. These people don’t care about you or anything about you or anyone else for that matter. All they care about is themselves. The world is in desperate need of love, kindness and compassion, something these people only have for themselves, not others. Sprinkle some love and kindness on them and hope that one day they may change.
Now that should almost go without saying but too many times we let little white lies slip and accept this behaviour. Don’t do that. Little white lies eventually turn into bigger lies and anyone who has to go through life lying cannot be trusted. Ever. Lying hurts my heart too. Trust is so easily lost yet it’s the one most important quality to have. First sign of dishonesty of any kind, walk away.
Let me explain. We all get angry sometimes over little things, big things, or what have you. We all just do. But there’s always that one person who is just angry all the fucking time and never sees the good in anything and is always so pessimistic. Stay the hell away from this person. Anger is such a horribly low vibrational energy that nothing good ever comes from it. If you must be around someone like this, put your shield on!
You ever get stuck in a room or at a party with someone who whines and complains just to get your sympathy? Nothing is going right in their life, ever. Work is bad, home life is bad, just everything is always bad and wrong. They whine just to hear their own voice. They also whine because they want you to lick their wound for them and say “Oh poor you, that’s horrible!”. Back away. They will suck you into their shit vortex and you’ll be trapped there for what will seem like an eternity.
You know, life is meant to be lived in joy, peace, love and freedom. I get that not all days are good days and sometimes we need to meet people like the ones mentioned above to learn lessons.
Learn the lesson and start walking. Don’t let their toxic behaviour rub off on you so much that they ruin your day or worse yet, you become like them.
“These boots are made for walking, and that’s just what they’ll do…..”
Peace and Love