3 Common Struggles Every Strong Woman Has to Face Alone

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I love being the strong woman that I am today. I hold my head up high, I’m pretty proud of how far I’ve come, my level of self confidence has reached a ridiculous all time high. Yup, life is pretty sweet being a strong woman. But….it doesn’t come without its struggles.

Not always.

People see what’s on the outside. They are amazed at how resilient I am (though some days I still amaze myself with that one), they cheer me on and sing songs of praise to me about how wonderful I am.

Ya, but some days, I just don’t feel so wonderful. The struggle is real.

Inside I am scared, alone and tired.

Please take a moment to check out my latest article on loving yourself and dealing with relationship anxiety

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3 common struggles every strong woman must face alone


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What are the characteristics of a strong woman anyway?


People often think that a strong woman is powerful, persuasive and maybe even domineering. That’s partially true, maybe. That’s a super confident woman in my opinion.

The characteristics of a strong woman, I think, are these:

  • she’s confident
  • she holds her head up high despite going through hard times
  • she smiles on the outside regardless of the pain she feels inside
  • she’s not afraid to step out of her comfort zone to get s**t done
  • she stands up for others
  • she builds others up
  • she knows things will work out, no matter what

A strong woman will walk away from things that don’t serve her. She will walk away from drama and negativity. She will walk away from toxic people and gossip.

She is confident in her values and boundary lines.

These are just a few traits I think a strong woman have. Can you add to that list?


3 Struggles the strong woman must face alone


Wow, you did that? Having to do really scary stuff alone.


Why yes, yes I did, but lemme tell ya, it was scary as heck. It took me days, weeks and sometimes even months of planning some of the ballsy stuff I did. There were many days I wish I had someone to hold my hand or rub my back gently and tell me everything was going to be ok. There were days I SO longed to have a person like that.

But I didn’t. The strong woman that I am, went it alone.

And in all honesty, it was kinda lonely being that ballsy and strong, alone. There were moments when I hated it. I just wanted to curl up in ball in the corner of the room and make the world go away.

But I didn’t.

So, ya, I did that. I’m super proud of myself and still pat myself on the back some days for that, but it wasn’t easy, at all.

Sometimes a strong woman must do scary things alone. She secretly sometimes wishes she had someone by her side to help her, cheer her on or encourage her. But she doesn’t. She takes a big deep breath and leaps. Alone.


How to be a strong woman emotionally


Having to resist temptation when you really don’t want to


Like that time I met that really cute boy who I started having such a huge crush on. Everything about him screamed “run away now”, and I didn’t until one day I had to dig deep and remember who I was, where I’ve been, what my triggers are and everything I had to do to work so hard to get to where I am today.

When you’ve been alone for so long and all you want is to love and be loved. Be appreciated for who you are and have attention and affection.

What about that time….?

That time I had to stand strong and stand up for what I believed in and remember what I wouldn’t put up with ever again. I had to be strong even though every aching part of my body wanted that cute boy. Every part of my body that longed to be touched and loved and held and shown admiration and love to.

I had to stay true to who I was and turn away from the cute boy.

I had to be strong. And that wasn’t easy. At all (seriously it’s hard to resist a cute boy!).

Just because we are strong women doesn’t mean we aren’t tempted by things. We know how to say no to them, even though we really really want them. We know the consequences just aren’t worth it.


the struggles of being a strong woman

The battle with loneliness.


Is it loneliness? Not really, but some days it feels like it. Why doesn’t anyone get me? Why do I feel so alone most of the time? Why can’t I find someone who understands me, isn’t intimidated by me, doesn’t feel the need to challenge me all the time and can just accept and appreciate me for who I am?

Is that so much to ask?

When will being strong not be so hard? How I desperately secretly wish (ok maybe not so much a secret anymore) that I had someone, not necessarily a life partner but even just someone who can just make all these decisions for me and reassure me that everything is going to be ok and I’m on the right path.

How I wish that being strong didn’t suck the life out of me some times. Some times, it actually makes me cry.

A strong woman, the single strong woman, does sometime wish she didn’t have to make all the decisions herself. Sometimes she wishes someone else could take the lead.


the struggles of being a strong woman


The biggest struggle of being a strong woman is……


When everyone thinks you’re fine


No one asks if you’re ok. Everyone thinks you are such a strong woman that your life is great and you can handle whatever crap life throws at you and you don’t have to ask for help because you’re kinda like super woman.

Fact of the matter is, you’re not. You sometimes secretly desperately wish someone would comfort you, hold you, take are of things for you. Be there for you. It’s tiring and exhausting to do things on your own all the time and…

…truth be told, sometimes you just wanna tap out. Just because we’re strong doesn’t necessarily mean we’re invincible or don’t need help. Sometimes we do. Here’s the catch though, we don’t like to ask for help. Because…well, we’re strong right?

If we ask for help then people think we’re weak and heaven forbid that should happen.

It’s a tough place to be.


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Being a strong woman can be exhausting, but powerful at the same time


So, you see, for me, being strong isn’t always that easy or fun. Rewarding, in the long run, yes, but at the very moment I need to be strong, not so much fun and super effin hard. But I’ll tell you, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Even though some days, I still wish I could wave a magic wand and have someone else take care of things for me.

Bartender, make that a double shot of tequila por favor.

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  • I Iva, what an article. Its like reading my own feelings, experiences, desires and wants written by someone else. My story unfolds right in front of me. Yap, its lonely out there but at the end, you’ll find yourself strong, fighting and standing.

    Its a scene that keeps repeating.

    Yeah, how I wish, I will have that someone, who will be there, just to comfort you, assures and simply put your head on his chest and let the moment slips away. Wishful thinking.

    • Hey Jem glad you liked the blog and you’re right, wishful thinking. But I think if we keep wishing then maybe one day we will get that chest to lay our heads on :)

      much love

    • Mind Blown! U got this. U will find ur comfy chest, and It will come with arms to hold u and kisses that make u forget the world for a minute. :

  • Happy to hear you’ve grown to be a strong woman you are today. Yes it must get lonely at times but you’re resilient and that’s what matters. And it’s quite possible the right partner will come your way. And when that happens you’ll definitely be ready for it.

  • I can totally relate to this. Sometimes I feel like because we’re strong women people expect us to be invincible. Everyone has moments of vulnerability and loneliness. It just comes with the territory.

    • Thank You so much.
      Thank you for expressing what i could not.

  • I can’t think of anyone who hasn’t felt this way at some point, and well, I’m with you there right now! I had some really tough choices over the past few years, including leaving toxic relationships and now I haven’t dated in nearly 3 and a half years! It is lonely at times but I know being strong and independent thus far is right for me but yeah… I’m ready to meet a new romantic partner too. I hope we both find what we are looking for soon and until then, keep being a badass.

  • I understand what you mean… I struggle with loneliness all the time and it’s painful. Thank you for writing this. May God bless you and grant you ease… Amen.

    • I have been having to be strong thru alot of things in my life . And make choices that were hard .Been thru divorce . And remarring. the same man only to find out again it didnt work .But in that thru the things that led to a split up again were very real and I had to be strong. For me . I cant seem to find the person I want and need . And I felt that I cant be dealing with the way I felt when I saw the reasons I had to relize I can foegive But not forget. the things that left me very hurt . so I am seperated and ready to divorce . And I had to be strong .And still trying to be strong . And now knowing It wont ever work .I know I just want to be loved in a special way .And somtimes I feel like I am older now .and It seems I am not young enough or I dont feel strong enough to be alone .And I want. So much to be that speacial person is that to much .It seems I am not sure But It is hard to stay strong alone .

      • It is hard to stay strong alone Kayla, you’re right, but it’s not impossible. I think we all want that special person xo. Thank you for reading and sharing your feelings. xo

  • I love the experiences that you told in this post, some were similar to my own. Being strong isn’t so easy but we keep fighting and pushing through. Happy international women’s day x

  • this reminds me of my sister – she has been through a lot of unnecessary hardships and now she is older and wants a a partner but is feeling like she has a lot of baggage on top of how much her job entails. thank you for sharing your story. I am glad you are focusing on yourself right now. My sister is trying to do the same

    • I wish your sister well and hope one day she finds what she deserves xoxoxo :)

  • This is such a good post, and being a strong woman does have its good and bad points. I didn’t even think of loneliness, but that makes sense.

  • As women, the experiences we have shape us.
    It’s good to be courageous.
    We sometimes feel alone and also have issues too but we just need to trust in God in all these things

  • I fonud myself so much in this ? i feel you girl but we know what kind od man we deserve and someone like it will come along when the time is right. Someone who wol match our strength. Keep doing you ❤️

  • Absolutely love this!! It’s so very true. No one asks how we are, they just assume we’re ok. Love the blog lady!

  • Amazing article !!
    Thank you for sharing and showing your personal journey!
    It’s my personal journey as well!!
    Glad to know I’m not alone!!

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