Have I really been sleeping for all these years? Probably. I mean, maybe not in a complete life coma but pretty close. I sit here and type this and realize my whole life is a haze, a blur. All 53 years of it. What on earth have I been doing all this time? But most importantly, why did it take me this long to wake up? It took me a while to see the signs. And they were very clear signs!
I used to remember hearing people say life begins at 50 and wondered what that meant. I totally get it now. Life really does begin at 50. I went through a whole lotta crap (and good stuff too!!) for the first 50 years of my life. It was colourful to say the least. And honest to God, I hit 50 and my first thought was “what am I doing?” It was time to wake up. I took inventory of my life
and these things flashed by.
Signs that it was time to wake up.
You’re probably more than halfway through life.
This was a big one for me. Omg. More than half of my life is gone. What have I been doing? Well, living actually, but more like learning and preparing me for the next half of my life, I like to think anyway.
There are so many more things I want to do.
Travel, write books, speak in public. I had a list as long as my arm and I hadn’t even knocked off a fraction of it. I had to get cracking at that.
I have a purpose and I need to start living it.
No no no, not this girl. Not any of us really, but that’s how we live. We wake up, go to work, pay bills and die. We have so much more to do than that. You know that.
I was stuck and frustrated.
I felt this anxiety inside of me that kept poking at me. Almost wanting to scream at me, “hey lady, wake up
!! You got things to do. What on earth are you waiting for”? These signs were starting to come in loud and clear.
I was tired of just existing.
I wanted to live. There’s a life to live and I was just existing
. There was a life buried in my dream of dreams and I needed to unleash it. Live it, see it, taste it, feel it. It was dying to get out. If this isn’t one of those in your face signs then I don’t know what is.
There’s a free spirit inside that needs to be freed.
I could feel her.
Why was I keeping her locked up inside? A spirit inside of me that was crying, I could almost hear her moaning in anguish, wanting to be freed. I had to let her escape and live.
The world needs me.
I don’t mean this in an egotistical way. I mean the world is in desperate need of healers,
lovers and kind people and I was one of them. Why was I not sharing all that with the world? The world needs me. One of the biggest signs for me!
I don’t want to die with regrets.
I can’t and won’t be 80 years old, lying in my death bed and thinking “damn I wish I would have….”. I don’t want to be that person. I refuse to be that person.
You only get one shot.
This is it. You’re not going to get another chance to do shit if you didn’t do it while you were alive. Iva, what on earth are you waiting for? Stop pretending and practicing. Get out and live.
Being happy is my birthright and it’s time to start being.
Happiness has been inside of me all this time, also screaming to get out and be released and experienced. I had been miserable for many many years. I did whatever I felt I had to do to get to that place of happiness and man, it was worth it. Another powerful and clear sign.
So much inside of me woke up. There were people to see and love, joy to share, love to spread, smiles to see and a beautiful life to live. At 50 years old, it was time to do it. It was finally time to wake up and I have never been happier in my life, ever. (ok well maybe except the day my kid was born)
Ooops, I must have overslept. What time is it??
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